Solitude

I am kinda feeling like this tree these days. It is a weird and crappy feeling. Well not actually feeling LIKE a tree, that would be weird for sure and probably scratchy. But definitely a solitary/lonely vibe going on.

It's weird because I am so used to having a lot of friends around. Back in Seattle and in Edmonton and even Vancouver I always had girlfriends to get together with for coffee or a drink. You know the kind of friend I am talking about. The ones you can just sneak away with for an hour or 2 to catch up and have some much needed girl time. I don't have that here, I never really have and lately it is really bothering me. I don't know why I don't, believe me I have spent a lot of time to try and figure out the answer. Maybe my weight issues have made me a lot more introverted than I used to be. Perhaps that's part of issue. Or maybe people just really actually don't like hanging out with fat people. I talk with all my friends elsewhere on a regular basis and that is great don't get me wrong. But there is something to be said about having people in the place you live that you feel like you can call out of the blue and just talk or go for a walk. It's weird, it's a weird place to be. And if I am being honest I totally hate it.

And yes I suppose I am feeling sorry for myself today. But Andrea told me I am allowed to feel sorry for myself today. She is very wise, in fact she knows all things. Well, at least we let her believe that. That is all....

Random Thoughts

--Dear Booger Picker,

I realize you had some sort of issue with your nose this morning and I am sorry for that. What I also realize is that there is such things as kleenex, handkerchief your sleeve even if that was all you had. But you decided instead that you would dig to your hearts content with your finger to retrieve that outrageously wrong booger that just needed to be gotten. You did not care that you were surrounded by people who were probably as horrified as I was to see what you were doing. I mean really WHO still picks their nose in public? Not that I am condoning private nose picking, but at least then I don't have to witness it. Thank God my stop arrived so I did not have to witness what you actually may have pulled out with all that hard work.

--Dear MBTA (Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority),

The 80 bazillion year old man driving my bus this morning was a little frightening. I swear we almost crashed 5 times. I suppose I should be grateful for the wake up call since I was still half asleep when I got on the bus.

--Dear stupid stupid dog owners,

I know I have said this before but I will say it again. There is this amazing invention called a PLASTIC BAG. When your precious little Fifi poops use said PLASTIC BAG and pick it up. I am not sure why people bother getting a dog but don't want the responsibility of taking care of it. If you need some tips on picking up the poop you can click HERE and read a previous post I directed at people just like you.

--Dear PETA,

Yes it is me again. You may remember me from my last post about you. Click HERE if you need a reminder. I love ice cream, I love it a lot. I thank God for cows. I love milk and again I thank God for cows. They are DAIRY cows. It is what they do. What else did you think the udders were for? Decoration? I have actually milked a cow before and it certainly was not seeming to give a hoot. So when you pitched the idea to Ben and Jerry of Ben and Jerry fame did you actually think they were going to say okay? What were you thinking they would do? Say yes and hire a factory of women to pump breast milk? It's not okay for cows to be milked but it is for women? Do you realize how much breast milk and how many women it would take to accomplish what you asked? And really, BREAST MILK? MMMMMM breast milk ice cream. Sounds scrumptious!! Again, you people are off the wall...

I think that is it for now. I am sure tomorrow there will be more things I just need to let you know about. I clearly seem to be over my blogging funk because I can't seem to stop blogging these last 4 days. Enjoy it while it lasts I suppose, who knows when it will end again.

Just Because...

Rainy Days

It rained ALL weekend. And when I say ALL weekend I really mean it. Therefore we stayed in most of the weekend. Belle has energy coming out of her ears. I suppose I could walk her in the rain but she is a wuss and walking in the rain for her is like torture. So instead she whines to go out and so we get ready to go but then you open the door and she sticks her head out and remembers the rain and back inside she goes. Anyways I got some much needed stuff done around here I have been slacking on. Also rain makes me sleepy so I am going to go to bed now.

An insightful post if there ever was one. But really, who are you to complain. Four days in A ROW now I have blogged, count yourselves lucky ;)

TV Addicts Unite

Ok, so I wouldn't really call myself an addict. But the technological age we live in allows us the freedom of recording shows on our DVR's and Tivo's and watching them whenever we have time. Ok well maybe I am an addict. But really, who are you all to judge. I know plenty of you are sucked into TV land just as much as I am and some of you are bordering on needing therapy. But I don't judge you, well not too your face anyways.

I always struggle with knowing what new shows to watch. A few reasons perplex me. One being the fact that you just never know what shows will make it. Sadly my heart has been broken oh so many times when a show I had grown to love was cancelled before it even had a chance. Then there is the shows that do make it and you waste your time watching only to realize it SUCKS!

So what am I watching new this TV season you ask?

90210: Yes I realize some of you will mock me for this. But you know what? I really don't care. The original 90210 was an important part of my life for a lot of years. I owe it to the new 90210 to watch it and give it the same chance as the original. Honestly as cheesy as it might be, I like it. Although I have to agree with Kristen those girls need to eat and get some meat on those bones.

Fringe: AWESOME! I love love love this show. It is X-fileish in it's own way. I love the characters, the acting is good and the story lines thus far have been great. I knew I would love this show since it is from the brilliant mind of JJ. Abrams. His track record is pretty darn good...Alias (my fave show ever), Lost and now Fringe.



Returning favorites:

Grey's Anatomy: Chris and I actually just watched the season premiere tonight. I just really love this show. I love that it is a drama but that it is full of one liners that constantly have me laughing. Chris and I laughed so much throughout the episode tonight. I can't seem to look away from this show. What will become of Derrick and Meredith? Will Izzie and Alex end up together? What will happen with Cristina and HOTTIE new guy Kevin McKidd? I look forward to this show all week long and I am SO glad summer is over and it is back.

Lipstick Jungle: My guilty pleasure of the week. I never got into Desperate Housewives. I really don't know why. The premise of the show just never grabbed me enough to want to watch it. But Lipstick Jungle sucked me in from the first preview. You can be sure to find me on Wednesday nights curled up on the couch with a bottle of wine watching it while Chris is off at softball. Now if only I could convince Georgette (HINT HINT) to come over and watch it with me all would be good.

Other shows I have to record on my DVR:

Survivor
CSI
LOST
Private Practice
The Office
Chuck
The Office
ER
Life

How about you? What are you watching this TV season?

Fat Be Gone

Being over weight is something I have never really gotten used to. I have hated every moment of it actually. That's probably a good thing because it keeps me determined to get to a better place eventually. I spent most of my life at 130-135 pounds. Shocking I am sure to some of you who only know me at this weight. I am not really sure what changed. But somewhere along the way I managed to slowly gain weight. One pound at a time. That is how it gets you--gradually over time. You don't pay attention and then one day you wake up and your over 100 pounds over weight. Shocking AND embarrassing.

For a long time I had the attitude that I had way too much weight to lose so why bother. My goal was to just not gain anymore weight. Which as a dog walker was easy for me to do. I didn't gain because I walked so much during the week but I didn't lose either because I was not watching what I was putting in my body.

I woke up one morning in January 2007 (the 15th to be exact) and stepped on the scale and for some reason it hit me that day more than it ever had. The number on the scale staring back at me was an astonishing 248 pounds. I was dumbfounded. That is a HUGE number. You know I think fat people sometimes are convinced they weigh less than they do. They hide the actual number from everyone around them. Like somehow we are convinced our friends and family can't make an educated guess on their own just from looking at us. But there I stood looking at a number I never thought I would see when I stood on a scale. That morning was a turning point for me. In that moment I was shocked and disgusted at how far I had let myself go from where I once was. It was devastating and I knew I had to do something.

SO... I set myself a daily calorie limit. I have never considered it dieting. To me the definition of a diet is something you do to fix a present problem. For me it has to be about everyday and changing habits. I just watched how much I ate but never denied myself of things. On top of all the walking I was doing for work I started using the elliptical everyday and I bought an exercise DVD. Before I knew it I had lost almost 50 pounds and I felt amazing. Yet somehow after Christmas last year I fell back into old habits. I didn't exercise the way I had been and I stopped worrying about what I was eating and when I was eating it. I gained back almost half of what I had lost. Disappointing yes, but it's not the end of the world. Weight loss is no different than any other journey. Ups and downs are part of the process.

So here I am. I last weighed myself Monday morning. 222 pounds. I feel like I am back on track in my eating and exercise. Perhaps I failed before because my reasons were not the right ones. I felt like I was doing it for everyone else and not me. This time it is different. I am sick of being the fat girl. I am tired of being the token fat friend and I am sure as heck sick of feeling like new people don't want to be my friend because I am fat. I am blessed to have a husband who loves me regardless if I am the size I am now or the size I was when I met him. But it isn't okay with me anymore to be this size. I miss the outgoing person I used to be. I am tired of feeling tired and tired of feeling like my weight is holding me back from doing the things I want to do in my life.

So there you have it. No use beating around the bush. Evey is back on the wagon and determined more than ever NOT to fall off. I am not entirely sure I am completely ready for the emotional journey I know this is going to be. But I do know I am ready to rediscover who I am . It isn't just about the number on the scale at the end. It could get crazy in here so brace yourselves....

On a side note. I really suck at spelling the word exercise. When I ran spell check on this post it showed up wrong every time. Why is that? Is it really that hard a word to spell? Hmmm!!

Brace yourselves, Evey is back!

Yes I realize I haven't blogged in a long time. Yes I realize I suck and yes I realize most of you don't bother coming here anymore. But for those of you who do I thought I would get back into the swing of things by telling you that there is NOTHING like the smell of fresh and stale (yes both) urine while walking through the subway station. AWESOME!!For the record guys THIS picture above is of a urinal. THAT is where you should deposit urine. I am just saying it might be a better option.

While I am at it I suppose I should also address the guy on the bus wearing very tight track pants. Not only were you wearing them you were clearly wearing them alone. That's right ladies NO underwear or boxers in sight. It doesn't help when the bus is crowded and he ends up standing RIGHT IN FRONT of where I was sitting and his crotch was eye level. There he was free as a bird. I mean I am not a guy but I would think that would not be a good thing, I would think you would want things in place and protected. Not just there for the world to see. Perhaps he just has no clue how nasty it is for a guy to walk around in sweats or track pants with nothing holding his business in place underneath. **Shudder* Then again maybe he likes things that way. To each their own I suppose, I just wish I hadn't witnessed it so up close and personal.

Back from the beach

My lack of blogging would make it seem as though we did not make it back from our vacation. Oh how I wish. I slept better down there than I have in 4 years. The king size bed may have had something to do with it but I am betting it had much more to do with the sound of the ocean lulling me to sleep like a baby.

We got home Sunday night to find that our modem was no longer working. How awesome considering we just got it at the beginning of August when we moved. Verizon was supposed to ship us a new one but the lovely lady we talked to never processed it. It will now be shipped out first thing Monday morning. Oy! So I sit here typing with a very sketchy wireless connection. I am not sure how long it will last so you will just have to wait for a post about our vacation.

I will say we had an awesome time. I have been needing a vacation, getting out of the city and not having to worry about anything or having anywhere to be. It was beautiful down there and I wish we didn't have to leave. Here are some pics to tie you over...

We are headed to Myrtle Beach, South Carolina this morning. A week of nothing but the beach and golfing, we couldn't be happier...

Lazy Sunday

So what would you do on a sunny Sunday afternoon when you have an apartment to unpack and a trip to get organized for? Well, whether it is the right or wrong answer this is what we did...

That's right. We sat out in the sun and enjoyed a few ice cold beers. Even Belle got in on the action trying to work on her tan.

On an unrelated note, Belle's new favorite place to be is sitting on the back of the couch. She loves to sit up there when we are watching TV.

Unless you live under a rock I am sure you all know about the horrific murder that happened on a Greyhound bus in Manitoba, Canada a few weeks ago. A human life tragically taken for no apparent reason other than the mental instability of a man who never got the help he needed. 22 years old and a young mans life was taken from him in a savage and viscous way. So many are left hurt in this tragedy--the victims family and friends, the family and friends of the accused and the people who witnessed something so horrifying that I am sure it will stay with them for a long long time. And yet in the midst of all the tragedy and grief there will always be the fanatical groups out there who have to have their say.

Cue the crazies over at PETA. You just knew they had to sink their teeth into this one. Listen, I am a HUGE animal lover. Anyone who knows me knows that. I respect a lot of the work PETA does in fighting cruelty to animals etc. But sometimes they are WAY over the top and need to know when to just shut their mouths. Not long after Tim McLean lost his life on that Greyhound bus on a desolate Canadian highway PETA released an ad that went as follows--

"Manitoba . . . An innocent young victim's throat is cut . . . His struggles and cries are ignored . . . The man with the knife shows no emotion . . . The victim is slaughtered and his head is cut off . . . His flesh is eaten. It's still going on! Right now, this exact scenario is reality for many. They are sensitive, they value their lives, they see what is happening, they cannot run away, and they often suffer greatly yet are being killed for nothing more than a fleeting taste of their flesh."

PETA had to go out of the way to compare the life of a HUMAN BEING to that of an animal. Are you freaking kidding me? Whether the way a pig is slaughtered is humane or not that pig was put on this earth by God with a purpose and it wasn't just to roll around in the mud all day. Tim Mclean was not put on this earth to be the release point for some sick and twisted killer. To compare Tim's life with that of a pig, cow or any other animal of your choosing is off the wall insane. What happens when the president of PETA loses a family member in a horrific way? Are they going to stoop as low to make the same comparison in their own lives?

THIS article I came across this evening was my motivation for this post.

"The killings we have witnessed on the slaughterhouse floor, the cries of the animals and their desperate struggles, don’t make the news, so it’s PETA’s job to put them there"

I hope you guys over there at PETA sleep well at night while the mother of a young man is mourning the senseless death of her child. I hate to break it to you folks there at PETA but it is not your job to open your mouth and exploit the death of another HUMAN being for your own benefits. Maybe try and have a little class and pick a better time to get your point across. This is why organizations like PETA and others like it turn me off. They will stop at nothing to get their point across even if it means comparing human life to that of a cow or pig.

I love animals and I do wish cows etc were killed in a little more human way. I agree that some of these animals suffer terrible deaths and it breaks my heart. But my stomach doesn't turn when I eat a steak but my stomach sure turns and I feel nothing but sadness when I think of the horrific death an innocent young man experienced. If that makes me a bad person then I own it.

For the record this post was not meant to be a debate on what is right and wrong as far as animal cruelty goes. It was simply my own personal frustrations on something that struck a cord with me. This is my blog and I feel I have the freedom to say what I want. I know people will read this and disagree with me but please do not turn my comment section into fighting match. If you have a problem with anything I have said email me and we can discuss it away from my blog. Then again since I am such a big blog slacker I am not even sure anyone still reads this thing outside of my family. lol.

My deepest condolences to the McLean family.

If anyone is interested there is a post up on sports blog about why we went to Cooperstown, NY a few weeks ago. Go check it out.

http://www.cemcsports.blogspot.com/

Lightning and I are not BFF...

Ok so I never did get around to telling my story about the lightning storm we drove through in upstate New York a few weeks ago and I suppose there is no better time than the present.

Chris and I drove to Cooperstown, New York to attend the Hall of Fame ceremonies honoring those being inducted into the National Baseball Hall of Fame. For those of you who are actually interested in reading about that weekend you can do so over at our sports blog. Give me a day or so though to get it all up and posted. I have been busy, cut me some slack;) For those of you who are too lazy to go over to the side bar and click the link I have kindly put the link HERE for you. But don't leave yet, you have to read this post first.

So after a long day of touring Cooperstown, the National Baseball Hall of Fame and Museum waiting outside the hall on the Saturday night to try and catch a glimpse of many of the stars of baseballs past and perhaps get an autograph or two, we decided we should be heading back to Albany about an hour or so away which was where we were staying. The weather had been threatening all day long and now that it was late (12am) and dark the rain was starting and the thunder was cracking and before long the lightning was lighting up the sky all around. We ran through the pouring rain to the car, hoping all the way that the lightning would not hit any of the trees surrounding us as we ran along the sidewalk. Finally in the car all safe and sound we started to drive and head toward the highway. Little did we know how crazy this storm really was.

We had about 10 miles or so to drive on a small 2 lane highway completely surrounded by trees. You would think this would make me feel better considering the lightning is likely to hit the trees before it would the car. But no, it was ridiculously terrifying. There were flashing literally every 2-3 seconds. I am not talking pretty flashes off in the distance, I am talking giant bolts of lightning touching down beside, in front and behind us. It was crazy. The lightning was so bright and so often that it lit up the entire sky so it looked like it was early morning. We thought once we reached the main highway things would be better and we would be driving away from the storm. But no, the storm literally covered the entire northern part of the state. So for the next hour or so I was in constant fear of my immanent death. I am not afraid to admit how terrified I was. I even cried a little. I was convinced that was how I was going to die. A giant bolt of lightning was going to blast our car and I would be left a black smoking pile just like in the cartoons.

Then the other day Chris and I were driving into the city and decided to go across the Tobin Bridge. The Tobin Bridge is a very tall and long bridge that crosses the Mystic River and takes you toward downtown Boston. I had said to Chris that perhaps the bridge was not the smartest place to drive right now because of the lightning we were having. Apparently we get thunderstorms EVERY day now. Chris assured me we would be safe on the bridge because the lightning would hit the bridge and not cars and we would be fine. As we were a little over halfway across the bridge a GIANT bolt of lightning hit the railing directly to our left about 10 feet. It was bright and it was loud and it scared the crap out of us. We had Belle in the car and I thought she was going to poop right there in my lap. Moral of the story. DON'T drive on large metal objects during a lightning storm.

I said to Chris "maybe God is trying to tell us something!" lol. Whatever it is, I sure hope he tells us soon because I am a little tired of almost being struck by lightning.

Still Alive

I realize my neglect of this blog is getting worse by the day. I will not make excuses. Although, I have been insanely busy between work and trying to unpack and get everything here in our new place organized. I promise I will back to my blogging duties within a day or two and will have plenty of entertaining stories to share. Well okay, I admit they may not be all that entertaining but they will be stories and that is better than what you have been getting so quit your complaining;)

So yeah, lightning is scary

More to come about this. But we drove through the most insane lightning storm last night. I have never seen anything like it and was terrified. We had strikes like this one in the pic going off about every 5 seconds or so. They were so close and all around us. INSANE!! We took video and this picture is from that video.

Leaving Town....

Chris and I are off to Cooperstown, NY this morning. It is Major League Baseball Hall of Fame weekend and we will be going to the Hall of Fame as well as the induction ceremonies on Sunday. Good times.

Annuale

BEST SNL skit I have seen in a long time. I laugh so hard every time I watch it.

"Don't take annuale if you plan to ever become pregnant, as it may turn your baby into a fire monster"

LOL!!

Belle had all her shots at Petco on Sunday. She was not impressed. But she got to "pick" this toy afterwards so I am certain that made it all better.

The New Digs

So this is the front of the house. We are on the main floor. The window on the bottom left is our living room. The window on the bottom right is just in the little porch area that has both entrances to our apartment and our landlords upstairs.

There is a pretty decent sized back yard. No grass but lots of space for our BBQ and a table and chairs to hang out outside in the summer. And plenty of space to hang laundry if we want.

The kitchen. It is a good size with room for a table and chairs. Something we didn't have room for in our current place. The little lady in the picture below is our landlord, she is so nice and has lived in this house here ENTIRE life. 82 years, WOW!

The walk in pantry. I am SO excited about this. We currently have very little kitchen space and I always feel so limited when I am grocery shopping because I have nowhere to put anything. The extra space is going to be awesome.

Our lovely PINK tile bathroom which you all just know Chris loves even if he won't admit it;)
Our living room. I didn't really get great pictures but you get the idea. The front window is brand new. This place has lots of windows. Something we also don't have here since we are in a basement suite. It will be nice having natural light and not feeling like I live in a dungeon anymore. lol And I know Belle will be in heaven with windows to sit and look out all day long.
Our bedroom. Again didn't get very good pics but you get the idea. I love the windows.Spare room/computer room. We are so happy to have an extra room for our computer and storage space. We do plan on putting a bed in there in the near future so all of you slackers back west and up in Canada have no excuses not to visit now ;)